‘When we come to the pre-menstrual phase of our cycle, we start to turn inwards and need more space. This shift in gear means we need more time and space for ourselves which can have our kids feeling a loss or lack of connection.’
MELANIE SWAN
The shift in gear during our pre-menstrual phase means we need more time and space for ourselves – which can have our kids feeling a loss or lack of connection.
In this episode I share:
- How children can experience a loss of connection when we take time for ourselves
- What ‘acting-out’ means and looks like
- Why children do the 1 thing that pushes our buttons!
- How taking time for ourselves in a connected way builds a child’s relational muscles
- My top tips on help children feel safe whilst we are taking ‘me time’.
Effective strategies for creating ‘me time’ that both resources you and has your children feeling safe and connected.
- Explain what ‘me time’ is and why you need it when children are calm and feeling connected helps the concept sink in and feel great from the start.
- For some children it can be really helpful to have a physical thing for them to have to remind them of your return e.g. a special teddy bear that plays with them when mummy is lying down/taking space.
The bear has a message for them (which you can write on it somehow) ‘mummy is still here is coming back in xxxxx minutes’. Then build up the time each cycle and come back on time. - I suggest starting to practice this during ovulation phase or at a time when you know you have more patience!
Start with 2 to 5 minutes depending on how old your child is and build up from there. - Point out their own ‘me time’ to normalise it. Buying your child a diary or something they like to do that only requires them is a great way to highlight ‘me’ time for them.
- Draw a physical chart of your cycle and put it on the wall, so that your child knows what activities are coming and when. Plan them together so that they feel included in your cycle and can reference it for things they are looking forward to.
- Plan the more social activities on the chart for ovulation time when you know you’l feel more outward – and plan quieter activities during pre-menstrual time.
- Plan some time just for you – where someone else is taking care of them during Moontime – I find this massively helps us be more patient throughout the cycle!
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